Ahhh, vacation. To me, not only a luxury but a necessity.
Today we are returning from a ten-day vacation on Martha's Vineyard. It was such a wonderful experience: lots of uninterrupted, quality time with my husband and little man; beautiful landscape with miles of green farmland, colorful beach-side cliffs and one of the most beautiful sunsets I've ever seen; the most celebrated, historical (150 years old!) and iconic agricultural fair, a very successful fishing trip; and, as promised, the most spectacular fireworks show on earth.
But the quality of my vacation is not only in the location, duration or itinerary of the trip but in my ability to live in the moment. When I stay in the moment, time doesn't fly. When I savor each experience, I have no need to worry or ruminate. Mindfulness is the best way I know how to give my over-extended brain a break.
I've had a lot of great workouts on this trip...thanks to the extra hour and a half I get in the morning while the boys sleep in. I had one long run of about 12 miles from the town where I stayed to the next town up north. Plenty of ocean and scenery to distract my legs. I did the same trip on my bike one morning. A few miles to and from the beach a coupld days rounded out the endurance. The whole family struggled with a nasty cold so my breathing suffered a lot.
I visited a local yoga studio, which is always a treat. I always feel at home and the people are always genuine and friendly. I spent a few mornings on the mat in our back yard, once with Aidan along side me modifying his own little practice. I will treasure that morning forever.
And now back to life at home. I did spend a day or two feeling "in the weeds" but it was all worry and no reality. My brain is so used to overdrive. I'm still learning to relax and realize I'm never really behind...well, not as much as I think :)
Friday, August 26, 2011
Monday, August 1, 2011
Sometimes it Hurts but I Just Keep Running
My husband and I went to the Laurel Highlands yesterday. It was beautiful. We wanted to spend some time outdoors, which we both love. He spent a few hours fly fishing and I spent a few hours on a long run. I love running long on the Great Allegheny Passage...it's scenic, flat and surrounded by fresh air.
I set out and had a great couple hours. The only downside of the trail, as opposed to running in the city, is that once you run an hour in one direction you have no other option but to turn around and come back.....there are no short cuts, no different ways of returning. Every time in this circumstance I always have a bit of apprehension about that second hour. What if I get dehydrated? What if my legs give out?
Of course these are real possibilities but I could never run a marathon if I let these fears dictate my running. Yes I was sore, yes my knees hurt. And I was certainly thirsty...I only had one bottled water I carried with me. Unlike the city, there aren't too many (if any) water fountains a long the trail. But I made it. I ran the second hour faster than the first. I ran over 14 miles and felt great for having done so.
During my run I was thinking about my younger years when I really ran competitively. No one ever taught me to work hard. I really didn't know how or what that meant. If I started to feel uncomfortable during training or even during a race I always backed off. Always. I suppose I felt that if I pushed it too hard something bad would happen. Plus I just didn't like to feel uncomfortable.
Really the first time I overcame this was my first marathon a few years back. Hard work never promises no pain. But most often there is always a reward of sorts on the other side. This lesson shows up everywhere in my life these days. Discomfort means growth in so many circumstances. All I need is a little faith and support to wait out the discomfort long enough for the miracle. I am so grateful that I've learned this over the course of my young life. As long as I respect my body and my spirit, hard work always pays a dividend.
I'll just keep running!
I set out and had a great couple hours. The only downside of the trail, as opposed to running in the city, is that once you run an hour in one direction you have no other option but to turn around and come back.....there are no short cuts, no different ways of returning. Every time in this circumstance I always have a bit of apprehension about that second hour. What if I get dehydrated? What if my legs give out?
Of course these are real possibilities but I could never run a marathon if I let these fears dictate my running. Yes I was sore, yes my knees hurt. And I was certainly thirsty...I only had one bottled water I carried with me. Unlike the city, there aren't too many (if any) water fountains a long the trail. But I made it. I ran the second hour faster than the first. I ran over 14 miles and felt great for having done so.
During my run I was thinking about my younger years when I really ran competitively. No one ever taught me to work hard. I really didn't know how or what that meant. If I started to feel uncomfortable during training or even during a race I always backed off. Always. I suppose I felt that if I pushed it too hard something bad would happen. Plus I just didn't like to feel uncomfortable.
Really the first time I overcame this was my first marathon a few years back. Hard work never promises no pain. But most often there is always a reward of sorts on the other side. This lesson shows up everywhere in my life these days. Discomfort means growth in so many circumstances. All I need is a little faith and support to wait out the discomfort long enough for the miracle. I am so grateful that I've learned this over the course of my young life. As long as I respect my body and my spirit, hard work always pays a dividend.
I'll just keep running!
Thursday, July 28, 2011
So I biked
I woke up very exhausted this morning. My eyes stung and begged to be closed for just a bit longer. I am rarely tired in the morning...waking up this way is a very rare occasion.
Part of my exhaustion was due to the great 8-mile run I had yesterday. It was a beautiful, sunny but cool morning and I ran from my building downtown across and along the river. I had no music ( I think my iPod is dying) so it was a nice change. I had a very long conversation with myself, another rare occasion when I literally talk to myself as if I'm talking to an old friend. For a long time if I were "talking" to myself internally it usually wasn't nice. But yesterday was nice.
Anyway...I planned a no-run day. I also havdn't ridden my bike at all since last week so I planned on commuting to keep the legs loose and save the $12.
As soon as I woke up I immediately thought I was too tired to get on the bike. I spent the first 20 or 30 minutes of my day deliberating as to whether I should bike or just drive. I've gotten in the habit of sitting quietly, usually outside next to our garden, and meditating for a few minutes before I jump into the action of my day. Starting my day off like this has done wonders. After clearing the cobwebs and breathing fresh air into my body, biking became a good idea once again.
So I biked. And not only was it a good idea, but I was so energized and livened up by the exercise. I took my time. It turned out to be one of the more pleasant 10 miles on my bike that I've ever had. I got to work and the rest of my day followed suit.
The moral for me: when I don't feel like doing something - and it could be anything - is probably the time when I need to do "it" the most.
A lot of times I do need a break, a rest or something mindless but most of the time I don't feel like doing something for other reasons such as fear, avoidance, disbelief. And the miracles happen when I act despite my fear...every....single...time.
Part of my exhaustion was due to the great 8-mile run I had yesterday. It was a beautiful, sunny but cool morning and I ran from my building downtown across and along the river. I had no music ( I think my iPod is dying) so it was a nice change. I had a very long conversation with myself, another rare occasion when I literally talk to myself as if I'm talking to an old friend. For a long time if I were "talking" to myself internally it usually wasn't nice. But yesterday was nice.
Anyway...I planned a no-run day. I also havdn't ridden my bike at all since last week so I planned on commuting to keep the legs loose and save the $12.
As soon as I woke up I immediately thought I was too tired to get on the bike. I spent the first 20 or 30 minutes of my day deliberating as to whether I should bike or just drive. I've gotten in the habit of sitting quietly, usually outside next to our garden, and meditating for a few minutes before I jump into the action of my day. Starting my day off like this has done wonders. After clearing the cobwebs and breathing fresh air into my body, biking became a good idea once again.
So I biked. And not only was it a good idea, but I was so energized and livened up by the exercise. I took my time. It turned out to be one of the more pleasant 10 miles on my bike that I've ever had. I got to work and the rest of my day followed suit.
The moral for me: when I don't feel like doing something - and it could be anything - is probably the time when I need to do "it" the most.
A lot of times I do need a break, a rest or something mindless but most of the time I don't feel like doing something for other reasons such as fear, avoidance, disbelief. And the miracles happen when I act despite my fear...every....single...time.
Friday, July 22, 2011
Corporate Inspiration
I have had a smile on my face for days. I recently wrapped up one of the most involved and rewarding projects of my career. I developed a corporate wellness program in which the objective was to educate and inspire staff members to make positive lifestyle changes that would ultimately improve their energy, stress management and productivity in and out of the workplace. I was granted the opportunity to run this program with Simpson McCrady, an insurance brokerage company in my building.
A few days ago after three months the hardest work I've ever done, we finally celebrated the winners and the unbelievable success of those who took part. The program was also highlighted by KDKA, the local CBS affiliate here in Pittsburgh, this week. What a reward!
Here is the link:
http://pittsburgh.cbslocal.
Words cannot express my satisfaction of the outcome of this program.
A few days ago after three months the hardest work I've ever done, we finally celebrated the winners and the unbelievable success of those who took part. The program was also highlighted by KDKA, the local CBS affiliate here in Pittsburgh, this week. What a reward!
Here is the link:
http://pittsburgh.cbslocal.
Words cannot express my satisfaction of the outcome of this program.
- 32 employees participated
- 88 percent of those who participated utilized all aspects of the challenge (group exercise classes, one-on-one training sessions with me, fitness assessments, tracking steps with pedometers, wellness seminars)
- 97 percent improved in 2 of 3 areas (of their choice) that included weight loss, dietary changes, increase in strength and/or flexibility, cardiovascular fitness, increase in mindfulness and decrease in stress
- Folks who were aiming for weight loss (15 people) lost a total of 113.5 pounds
- 25 percent decreased his or her body composition for a company total of 15.7%
- 47 percent lost inches in various areas of their bodies (mostly waist)
- And 28 percent maintained an exercise program for the first time in his or her life.
AMAZING! Simply amazing. I'm at a loss for any additional words to add but I'm sure I'll come up with something in the next couple days.
Thanks to all for the endless support throughout this whole process. You all know how hard I worked and how all-consumed I was from April-July. And thanks to the amazing folks from Simpson McCrady who showed up, trusted me and did the work day in and day out to make the program such a success!!
Wednesday, July 20, 2011
ING
GAMETIME! I'm about three months away from the NYC marathon. Time to train! I'm also just about to kick off my fundraising campaign.
Training...no problem. I've only been running my whole life. I have a great base already; I've been running consistently the last 4 years. My plan is actually to reduce the days in a week that I run and improve the quality of those runs. I'm thinking one long run, one interval day and one tempo day; biking and yoga the other days, when I have the time.
I had a great run at Heartwood Acres on Monday...it was the first time I had ever been there. I didn't know what to expect. It was a beautiful park, lots of wooded areas (my favorite) and lots and lots of hills. I ran about 10.5 miles, half of which were uphill. Great workout!
Running is such relief for me. It affords me time to think, brainstorm, pray or just enjoy the beauty around me and stay in the moment. And to have the opportunity to help other people just from running a race is just another way to pay forward my gratitude for something that comes to easily to me.
Amen!
And now, off to the treadmill! The heat and humidity is absolutely ridiculous here in Pittsburgh today.
Training...no problem. I've only been running my whole life. I have a great base already; I've been running consistently the last 4 years. My plan is actually to reduce the days in a week that I run and improve the quality of those runs. I'm thinking one long run, one interval day and one tempo day; biking and yoga the other days, when I have the time.
I had a great run at Heartwood Acres on Monday...it was the first time I had ever been there. I didn't know what to expect. It was a beautiful park, lots of wooded areas (my favorite) and lots and lots of hills. I ran about 10.5 miles, half of which were uphill. Great workout!
Running is such relief for me. It affords me time to think, brainstorm, pray or just enjoy the beauty around me and stay in the moment. And to have the opportunity to help other people just from running a race is just another way to pay forward my gratitude for something that comes to easily to me.
Amen!
And now, off to the treadmill! The heat and humidity is absolutely ridiculous here in Pittsburgh today.
Thursday, June 23, 2011
A Little Dose of Exercise
Boy am I grateful for exercise. I was running outside the other day in between clients. I wasn't having the best day. At one point I could feel my perspective shift from one direction to the other, which started a cascade of gratitude for my ability and desire to exercise.
Exercise was literally the first way in which I learned how to "take care" of myself....at least physically. I always knew that I was doing something good for myself and in some way, it made any particular circumstance better. I had always had a tendency to build up emotions with no idea of how to filter, channel or deal with them. I started to learn via exercise. I learned that exercise was a means of relief.
By now I have learned how to take care of myself in many other ways...mental and emotional. And trust me, I'm still learning. But every lesson becomes more clear to me by ways of exercise. I don't always feel like heading our for a run or going to a yoga class or picking up the weights....but those are the workouts that create the most changes. It's the same in other areas too. For many years I avoided any difficult internal work ...I even denied that any work was needed! Now I have come to sit through the storm and have faith that:
1) NO emotion or feeling lasts forever.
2) Discomfort usually means growth (as long as no major harm or injury is occuring).
Oy....always working on something. Keep calm and carry on!
Exercise was literally the first way in which I learned how to "take care" of myself....at least physically. I always knew that I was doing something good for myself and in some way, it made any particular circumstance better. I had always had a tendency to build up emotions with no idea of how to filter, channel or deal with them. I started to learn via exercise. I learned that exercise was a means of relief.
By now I have learned how to take care of myself in many other ways...mental and emotional. And trust me, I'm still learning. But every lesson becomes more clear to me by ways of exercise. I don't always feel like heading our for a run or going to a yoga class or picking up the weights....but those are the workouts that create the most changes. It's the same in other areas too. For many years I avoided any difficult internal work ...I even denied that any work was needed! Now I have come to sit through the storm and have faith that:
1) NO emotion or feeling lasts forever.
2) Discomfort usually means growth (as long as no major harm or injury is occuring).
Oy....always working on something. Keep calm and carry on!
Thursday, June 16, 2011
Dancing Outside My Comfort Zone
Ahh the comfort zone. I love it in there. It's cozy and famililar. My expectations are met. My rules are followed. I can sit in there for days and days and days....the only problem is when I stay there for too long, nothing changes. No miracles happen. I have no spiritual awakenings, experience no breakthroughs, I don't get better at anything be it my job, my relationships, running or parenting.
I have learned the most difficult periods in my life have also offered the most opportunity for growth. Period. It doesn't make the difficulty any shorter or less painful, but I have developed a tolerance and a strong faith that I will be a much better version of myself at the inevitable light at the end of the tunnel.
I have made a habit of purposefully doing things that make me uncomfortable. I remember as a child if I tried something and I wasn't immediately good at it, I thought that meant I never would be therefore I wouldn't continue. I never did anything that I couldn't do well. I never understood patience or humility...all of which came to me through the difficult periods in my my life (Thank God!!).
A few years ago I signed up to run my first marathon...around the time I started this blog. Thay marathon was such a great story of my life. I was terrified. Despite the fact I had been running my entire life. Terrified. But I signed up anyway. I ran one day at a time. My training was not perfect, not even close. I wasn't fully prepared; I didn't take the time to learn about hydration or the fact that I should wear shoes a size and a half bigger than my feet. I only ran two "long" runs leading up to the race. At some point during my training, I surrendered to the idea that it wasn't going to be perfect. I let go of any expectations I had. I just wanted to finish...it didn't matter how quickly or how it looked....I just wanted to finish.
I spent a few months in total anxiety over this race. The biggest success throughout the whole process was the day I showed up. I just showed up. I ran despite my fear and it turned out great. I ran the whole thing and I did really really well! I learned so much through that experience.
Another dream come true is on the horizon...I am running the New York City marathon in Novermber, another huge honor. I'm running for Livestrong for a seond time. It's a huge commitment. I'm not a fan of fundraising simply because it's hard enough for me to ask for help let alone financial support. Lots of opportunity for growth here. What a great gift.
Gratitude is the most powerful tool I have to center my mental self.
I'm excited to share my experience throughout this process. It's also 6 months away, which is plenty of time to train hard and do well. After this race, I'm taking a break for bigger things :)
Be well!
I have learned the most difficult periods in my life have also offered the most opportunity for growth. Period. It doesn't make the difficulty any shorter or less painful, but I have developed a tolerance and a strong faith that I will be a much better version of myself at the inevitable light at the end of the tunnel.
I have made a habit of purposefully doing things that make me uncomfortable. I remember as a child if I tried something and I wasn't immediately good at it, I thought that meant I never would be therefore I wouldn't continue. I never did anything that I couldn't do well. I never understood patience or humility...all of which came to me through the difficult periods in my my life (Thank God!!).
A few years ago I signed up to run my first marathon...around the time I started this blog. Thay marathon was such a great story of my life. I was terrified. Despite the fact I had been running my entire life. Terrified. But I signed up anyway. I ran one day at a time. My training was not perfect, not even close. I wasn't fully prepared; I didn't take the time to learn about hydration or the fact that I should wear shoes a size and a half bigger than my feet. I only ran two "long" runs leading up to the race. At some point during my training, I surrendered to the idea that it wasn't going to be perfect. I let go of any expectations I had. I just wanted to finish...it didn't matter how quickly or how it looked....I just wanted to finish.
I spent a few months in total anxiety over this race. The biggest success throughout the whole process was the day I showed up. I just showed up. I ran despite my fear and it turned out great. I ran the whole thing and I did really really well! I learned so much through that experience.
Another dream come true is on the horizon...I am running the New York City marathon in Novermber, another huge honor. I'm running for Livestrong for a seond time. It's a huge commitment. I'm not a fan of fundraising simply because it's hard enough for me to ask for help let alone financial support. Lots of opportunity for growth here. What a great gift.
Gratitude is the most powerful tool I have to center my mental self.
I'm excited to share my experience throughout this process. It's also 6 months away, which is plenty of time to train hard and do well. After this race, I'm taking a break for bigger things :)
Be well!
Friday, May 20, 2011
Less Thought, More Action
Sometimes I think too much. Yes, that's possible. I can think myself into (and mostly out of) just about anything. One of the many great skills I have learned in my last six years of life is that I can take action despite my fear, insecurity or vulnerability. I just have to take action. Usually in the form of one small step. It's only through the action of taking that step when my fear, insecurity and vulnerability are dissipated and I am just a slight better version of my previous self.
I have taken many leaps in the last year...real miracles. I'm at the point where my gratitude is ready to speak a little louder and perhaps I can pay something forward by sharing my experience with those who are interested. I started this blog a long time ago and the honest truth is I have a very hard time committing to it. There is something about taking time to sit down and empty my thoughts...in writing. I ooze vulnerability and and the thought of sharing my honest opinions and experiences can prevent me from doing so.
I had the pleasure of having dinner with two of my greatest friends last night. They both convinced me to re-committ. I love you both...this one's for you!! XOXO
So today I'm just taking action by writing. Many more to come....
I have taken many leaps in the last year...real miracles. I'm at the point where my gratitude is ready to speak a little louder and perhaps I can pay something forward by sharing my experience with those who are interested. I started this blog a long time ago and the honest truth is I have a very hard time committing to it. There is something about taking time to sit down and empty my thoughts...in writing. I ooze vulnerability and and the thought of sharing my honest opinions and experiences can prevent me from doing so.
I had the pleasure of having dinner with two of my greatest friends last night. They both convinced me to re-committ. I love you both...this one's for you!! XOXO
So today I'm just taking action by writing. Many more to come....
Tuesday, March 8, 2011
One Plus One Equals....
I heard a great line recently that goes soemthing like this:
You can workout everyday, hard and long, and you'll be fit. But unless you eat healthfully, you won't look it.
It's the harsh truth! It's a common issue amongst the folks I work with and amongst the general population. But you figure even if you work out 60 minutes a day, which is what the Dietary Guidelines recommend for weight loss, you're still eating and sedentary for the rest of the time that you're not exercising. You can completely negate your efforts with an unhealthy diet. You can also negate your exercise with simply eating too much. Even too much healthy food will create a calorie excess.
I firmly believe that there is no magic diet or product that works best for weight loss. I am old-fashioned. It's about what types of food we choose and how much. It's about lifestyle choices. We have to choose a way of eating that we can live with and also that we enjoy!
I use Michael Pollan's wisdom (he's the author of great reads such as The Omnivore's Dilema and Food Rules). He says eat food, not too much, mostly plants. Simple, easy and right on as far as I'm concerned. I'm going to build on this in the coming posts. I'm always hot on nutrition. What we put in our body is one of the very few things we CAN control in out lives and it makes such a huge difference in so so many ways. Stay tuned for more of my passionate nutritional antics :)
You can workout everyday, hard and long, and you'll be fit. But unless you eat healthfully, you won't look it.
It's the harsh truth! It's a common issue amongst the folks I work with and amongst the general population. But you figure even if you work out 60 minutes a day, which is what the Dietary Guidelines recommend for weight loss, you're still eating and sedentary for the rest of the time that you're not exercising. You can completely negate your efforts with an unhealthy diet. You can also negate your exercise with simply eating too much. Even too much healthy food will create a calorie excess.
I firmly believe that there is no magic diet or product that works best for weight loss. I am old-fashioned. It's about what types of food we choose and how much. It's about lifestyle choices. We have to choose a way of eating that we can live with and also that we enjoy!
I use Michael Pollan's wisdom (he's the author of great reads such as The Omnivore's Dilema and Food Rules). He says eat food, not too much, mostly plants. Simple, easy and right on as far as I'm concerned. I'm going to build on this in the coming posts. I'm always hot on nutrition. What we put in our body is one of the very few things we CAN control in out lives and it makes such a huge difference in so so many ways. Stay tuned for more of my passionate nutritional antics :)
Sunday, February 13, 2011
30s Rock
Happy birthday to me!!!
I am full of peace and gratitude today. Not only have have I had the most wonderful weekend (thank you friends and wonderful husband) but I've been in this constant state of reflection and grace for the last 48 hours. My twenties were tough, dark sometimes and very tumultuous. Thos of you who know me, know exactly what I mean. It's amazing, absolutely amazing for me to think back over the last decade a.nd see how my life has changes, the people in my life has changed, how I've changed. Amazing.
The last year, the first of the thirtieth decade, was by far, the most humbling, rewarding year of my life. Above all else I've really gotten to know who I am, where I come from and where I'd like to go (at least set the sail). I learned how to take care of myself. Some people will never learn that all-important practice.
The biggest obstacle I find that people, mostly women, have in making themselves a priority is that they feel guilty. Guilt, guilt, blah. I can tell you the amount of time I devote to my enrichment, which includes but is not limited to, exercise, cooking, praying, meditating and self-reflection...finding ways to completely disengage from my mental clutter, is far worth the effort.
And you knows who benefits most? My son, for sure. my clients, my husband and all the people the matter most in my llife. My job, my household, and really...I become more available and willing to help other people. Nurturing my inner self allows me freedom to become selfless. Such a strange paradox. But true!
I have so much to look forward to this year. I've never felt better, been more at peace and so excited for tomorrow.
I love my thrities so far!
I am full of peace and gratitude today. Not only have have I had the most wonderful weekend (thank you friends and wonderful husband) but I've been in this constant state of reflection and grace for the last 48 hours. My twenties were tough, dark sometimes and very tumultuous. Thos of you who know me, know exactly what I mean. It's amazing, absolutely amazing for me to think back over the last decade a.nd see how my life has changes, the people in my life has changed, how I've changed. Amazing.
The last year, the first of the thirtieth decade, was by far, the most humbling, rewarding year of my life. Above all else I've really gotten to know who I am, where I come from and where I'd like to go (at least set the sail). I learned how to take care of myself. Some people will never learn that all-important practice.
The biggest obstacle I find that people, mostly women, have in making themselves a priority is that they feel guilty. Guilt, guilt, blah. I can tell you the amount of time I devote to my enrichment, which includes but is not limited to, exercise, cooking, praying, meditating and self-reflection...finding ways to completely disengage from my mental clutter, is far worth the effort.
And you knows who benefits most? My son, for sure. my clients, my husband and all the people the matter most in my llife. My job, my household, and really...I become more available and willing to help other people. Nurturing my inner self allows me freedom to become selfless. Such a strange paradox. But true!
I have so much to look forward to this year. I've never felt better, been more at peace and so excited for tomorrow.
I love my thrities so far!
Thursday, February 10, 2011
Hitting Your Stride
The sun is shining today and it makes SUCH a difference. The last couple weeks have been very productive in our hosuehold, both personally and collectively. I have learned that some days and weeks of the month are predisposed to be easier than others. Other days I feel tired, groggy and just plain lazy. Instead of wishing I were different in this regard, I've just learned to work with myself a little better to maximize my productivity.
I really believe it's about managing our energy. Work a little harder when I feel the extra energy. Run an extra mile, organize a drawer, finish the new project at work. And take rest when I need it. Skip the workout, sleep an extra hour....we all have choices in our daily lives that allow us to take care of ourselves.
So the detox has been over for a few weeks now. I still haven't chewed gum. Sugar is definitely back in the daily diet. I would be lying if I said otherwise. Progress, not perfection, right?
I've been swimming more and more. I've never been able to swim with my face in the water (comfortably). And as we all know, it;s so difficult to re-learn a skill as an adult. Old habits die hard. I know this...I make an effort to get in the pool a couple times a week. All I do is try. And this morning, my face just naturally found it's way under the water. It's starting to feel comfortable. I've always had the same recipe that I re-visit all the time: show up, do the work, have a little faith and celebrate the results. It's my equation for any new or exisiting task in my life.
SHOW UP: I have to make time. An extra hour a week to swim won't suddenly appear. We will make time for what's important. Even if I only end up with 15 minutes to swim on Friday, I still took the effort to get there, put on the suit and get in the water.
DO THE WORK: I have to be willing to learn a different method. I have to do my homework. Maybe I need a swim lesson or a friend who can teach me some better skills. I have to learn, learn some more and then practice. Repeat.
HAVE FAITH: I have to believe that what I am trying to do is really possible. I have to believe in the process and stay consistent, even when when I think my efforts are irrelevant. I have to ask for help when I need it and believe in the grace of something larger than myself.
CELEBRATE THE RESULTS: It is so true that it's not the destination that counts but the journey. We learn the most about ourselves through struggle, hard work and disappointment. I have to be prepared to accept whatever the outcome. So I may not swim the 800 meters with my face in the water. But I'm sure my swimming skills will improve regardless. And hey, (hopfully) I'll have completed my first triathlon. I mean, reason enough to celebrate!
We should all do thing that scare us...it's such an important part of growing up. Acting despite our fear. What are you afraid of?
I really believe it's about managing our energy. Work a little harder when I feel the extra energy. Run an extra mile, organize a drawer, finish the new project at work. And take rest when I need it. Skip the workout, sleep an extra hour....we all have choices in our daily lives that allow us to take care of ourselves.
So the detox has been over for a few weeks now. I still haven't chewed gum. Sugar is definitely back in the daily diet. I would be lying if I said otherwise. Progress, not perfection, right?
I've been swimming more and more. I've never been able to swim with my face in the water (comfortably). And as we all know, it;s so difficult to re-learn a skill as an adult. Old habits die hard. I know this...I make an effort to get in the pool a couple times a week. All I do is try. And this morning, my face just naturally found it's way under the water. It's starting to feel comfortable. I've always had the same recipe that I re-visit all the time: show up, do the work, have a little faith and celebrate the results. It's my equation for any new or exisiting task in my life.
SHOW UP: I have to make time. An extra hour a week to swim won't suddenly appear. We will make time for what's important. Even if I only end up with 15 minutes to swim on Friday, I still took the effort to get there, put on the suit and get in the water.
DO THE WORK: I have to be willing to learn a different method. I have to do my homework. Maybe I need a swim lesson or a friend who can teach me some better skills. I have to learn, learn some more and then practice. Repeat.
HAVE FAITH: I have to believe that what I am trying to do is really possible. I have to believe in the process and stay consistent, even when when I think my efforts are irrelevant. I have to ask for help when I need it and believe in the grace of something larger than myself.
CELEBRATE THE RESULTS: It is so true that it's not the destination that counts but the journey. We learn the most about ourselves through struggle, hard work and disappointment. I have to be prepared to accept whatever the outcome. So I may not swim the 800 meters with my face in the water. But I'm sure my swimming skills will improve regardless. And hey, (hopfully) I'll have completed my first triathlon. I mean, reason enough to celebrate!
We should all do thing that scare us...it's such an important part of growing up. Acting despite our fear. What are you afraid of?
Wednesday, January 19, 2011
Embracing Humanness
So tomorrow marks the two-week mark of our friendly "detox." What a great experence!
Matt and I both have battled serious sugar cravings the last three nights...I'm not sure if it's from habit or circumstance or whatever. So last night we gave in...we both had a bowl of sorbet. I've also had a few handfuls of dried cranberries the last couple nights too....not your usual sugar addictive food, I know, but hey this is full disclosure!
The real challenge now comes in moving forward. I still haven't chewed any gum and I am of the new opinion that gum is just a habit that I don't really need anymore. I also think that coffee is one thing I can have only every so often....well, we'll see. I am notorious for thinking I can add something back "occasionally" and then "occasionally" becomes "more frequently" and so on and so forth.
I did feel a little guilty last night...not so much about the content of the food but more so about caving in to the habit of eating before bedtime. Well, today I'll choose to celebrate my progress and not my perfection!
I am so grateful for my understanding and appreciation of good, nurturing food and what a difference it makes in my life. Also, how damaging sugar really is and feeling the difference without it.
Moving forward!
Matt and I both have battled serious sugar cravings the last three nights...I'm not sure if it's from habit or circumstance or whatever. So last night we gave in...we both had a bowl of sorbet. I've also had a few handfuls of dried cranberries the last couple nights too....not your usual sugar addictive food, I know, but hey this is full disclosure!
The real challenge now comes in moving forward. I still haven't chewed any gum and I am of the new opinion that gum is just a habit that I don't really need anymore. I also think that coffee is one thing I can have only every so often....well, we'll see. I am notorious for thinking I can add something back "occasionally" and then "occasionally" becomes "more frequently" and so on and so forth.
I did feel a little guilty last night...not so much about the content of the food but more so about caving in to the habit of eating before bedtime. Well, today I'll choose to celebrate my progress and not my perfection!
I am so grateful for my understanding and appreciation of good, nurturing food and what a difference it makes in my life. Also, how damaging sugar really is and feeling the difference without it.
Moving forward!
Thursday, January 13, 2011
Befriending Ourselves
I have said before and always known that I am my own worst enemy. Somewhere along my journey I developed a lot of personal criticism. Maybe you know it...that nasty voice that tells you to stay home, don't try, don't even bother...
I really only became mindful of this voice about four or five years ago and every since has been a journey to turn down its volume. This year I'd like to have more self-compassion. And like anything else, I have to practice.
When I was younger, I wouldn't participate in anything in which I couldn't excel. How dumb. Now in my adult/parenthood I think it's great for my spirit to try any and all things because I have an interest...even better if I'm not that good...it reminds me of my humaness and at the end of the day, what does it really matter anyway?
We're all like a beautiful garden that doesn't need anything else planted or added, it just needs cleaned up, cut back and have the weeds removed every once in awhile.
A lot of time I think I need something in order to do something else. But I had this realization yesterday that I am fully equipped to do whatever it is that I'd like to do...I do need more of anything...I just need less of those qualities that hold me back...self doubt, anxiety and fear to name the biggies.
What great news!! Suddenly I realize that I've created every hurdle in my path-my rigidity is the problem, not my circumstances.
It's Day Seven of the detox and I hope that the elimination of coffee and abundant sugar is reason for all this "mental clarity" and focus. I can't remember a time in my life when I could remember, think and create so easily. I have suspected that sugar and coffee exacerbate my existing anxiety but now I have proof!
It's also quite amazing to realize how much a slave I was to those substances! Gum included. Just...let...go. I feel such a sense of freedom. And I'm sleeping so well...so restfully.
I'm eager to see how much better I can feel after another week!
I really only became mindful of this voice about four or five years ago and every since has been a journey to turn down its volume. This year I'd like to have more self-compassion. And like anything else, I have to practice.
When I was younger, I wouldn't participate in anything in which I couldn't excel. How dumb. Now in my adult/parenthood I think it's great for my spirit to try any and all things because I have an interest...even better if I'm not that good...it reminds me of my humaness and at the end of the day, what does it really matter anyway?
We're all like a beautiful garden that doesn't need anything else planted or added, it just needs cleaned up, cut back and have the weeds removed every once in awhile.
A lot of time I think I need something in order to do something else. But I had this realization yesterday that I am fully equipped to do whatever it is that I'd like to do...I do need more of anything...I just need less of those qualities that hold me back...self doubt, anxiety and fear to name the biggies.
What great news!! Suddenly I realize that I've created every hurdle in my path-my rigidity is the problem, not my circumstances.
It's Day Seven of the detox and I hope that the elimination of coffee and abundant sugar is reason for all this "mental clarity" and focus. I can't remember a time in my life when I could remember, think and create so easily. I have suspected that sugar and coffee exacerbate my existing anxiety but now I have proof!
It's also quite amazing to realize how much a slave I was to those substances! Gum included. Just...let...go. I feel such a sense of freedom. And I'm sleeping so well...so restfully.
I'm eager to see how much better I can feel after another week!
Sunday, January 9, 2011
Up and Running
Well, I feel good. Three days without chewing gum or any added sugar and I feel like I can accomplish just about anything. I mean, that's partly true.
I have a mild headache and I'm still pretty irritable. It feels like all the toxins that were stored in the far recesses of my body are finally finding their way out. It doesn't feel great. I know that irritability, headaches and flu-like symptoms are all side effects. When you give your digestive system a vacation from processed foods and sugar, it's able to really clean out the system. I already feel lighter and cleaner.
I'm hoping my edginess dissipates over the next week or so.
This pattern of eating is such great practice for disipline. It's necessary for me to set boundaries for myself. It's working! And it's really not about restriction at all. It's about mindfullness and self nurturing and giving myself what it needs. So often I feed a hunger that has nothing to do with need of food.
I'm eager to continue. It's certainly empowering in other areas.
Miss the mangoes though. And here's Matt with a thought or two...
Day three hasn't been nearly as bad as day 1 & 2...And the positive flow is remarkable. I'm kind of a low-will-power person and I can't see any reason not to do this and see it through. I feel better and the person I see in the mirror is --pick a cliche-- more alive...
Nicole does a wonderful job making sure this process is fun and full of good food. I couldn't do this without her dedication. I'm too fearful to start, too lazy to cook all that she does and too wishy-washy to push it through, but with her, it's easy to have a partner in this silly game.
At least the caffine/sugar-withdrawl headaches are receeding...but seriously, I'd quit tobacco everyday over the withdrawl from caffine and sugar and whatever else, my body is screaming out for...
Goodnight Moon!
I have a mild headache and I'm still pretty irritable. It feels like all the toxins that were stored in the far recesses of my body are finally finding their way out. It doesn't feel great. I know that irritability, headaches and flu-like symptoms are all side effects. When you give your digestive system a vacation from processed foods and sugar, it's able to really clean out the system. I already feel lighter and cleaner.
I'm hoping my edginess dissipates over the next week or so.
This pattern of eating is such great practice for disipline. It's necessary for me to set boundaries for myself. It's working! And it's really not about restriction at all. It's about mindfullness and self nurturing and giving myself what it needs. So often I feed a hunger that has nothing to do with need of food.
I'm eager to continue. It's certainly empowering in other areas.
Miss the mangoes though. And here's Matt with a thought or two...
Day three hasn't been nearly as bad as day 1 & 2...And the positive flow is remarkable. I'm kind of a low-will-power person and I can't see any reason not to do this and see it through. I feel better and the person I see in the mirror is --pick a cliche-- more alive...
Nicole does a wonderful job making sure this process is fun and full of good food. I couldn't do this without her dedication. I'm too fearful to start, too lazy to cook all that she does and too wishy-washy to push it through, but with her, it's easy to have a partner in this silly game.
At least the caffine/sugar-withdrawl headaches are receeding...but seriously, I'd quit tobacco everyday over the withdrawl from caffine and sugar and whatever else, my body is screaming out for...
Goodnight Moon!
Friday, January 7, 2011
And Away We Go
Matt just went to lie down and I quote, "Nothing quite like a sugar and caffeine withdrawl headache...
Need I say more..."
I'm so proud of him...
I can count on one hand the number of days since the age of 15 that I haven't chewed gum. Today was one of those days. I can't believe I did it, quite frankly. My cravings to chew a piece of gum must have numbersd in the dozens today. And not eating anything sweet after dinner? Nuts.
I totally commiserate with the millions of people who attempt dieting. It's. So. Hard. You have to change your habits, your attention, your whole relationship with food. All I know is the first step is attention and mindfulness. If you can master your attention then you can master the universe. Well, your own personal universe, that is.
I want a piece of gum. I need a piece of gum. I am so used to popping a piece of gum into my mouth after I eat. I have ran many many miles while chewing a piece of gum. I need gum because my mind is so used to having it. Go figure. Distraction, breathing...it really does work. And you know what? I Don't need that piece of gum. It's the end of the day and the earth is still spinning and I'm still here.
I'm eager to break this habit.
I have a bit of a headache and I'm a little cranky. Otherwise, I already feel better. Plenty of energy even without the coffee. We ate quite good food. I feel nourished. And certainly accomplished.
If we can overcome ourselves, we can overcome anything.
Need I say more..."
I'm so proud of him...
I can count on one hand the number of days since the age of 15 that I haven't chewed gum. Today was one of those days. I can't believe I did it, quite frankly. My cravings to chew a piece of gum must have numbersd in the dozens today. And not eating anything sweet after dinner? Nuts.
I totally commiserate with the millions of people who attempt dieting. It's. So. Hard. You have to change your habits, your attention, your whole relationship with food. All I know is the first step is attention and mindfulness. If you can master your attention then you can master the universe. Well, your own personal universe, that is.
I want a piece of gum. I need a piece of gum. I am so used to popping a piece of gum into my mouth after I eat. I have ran many many miles while chewing a piece of gum. I need gum because my mind is so used to having it. Go figure. Distraction, breathing...it really does work. And you know what? I Don't need that piece of gum. It's the end of the day and the earth is still spinning and I'm still here.
I'm eager to break this habit.
I have a bit of a headache and I'm a little cranky. Otherwise, I already feel better. Plenty of energy even without the coffee. We ate quite good food. I feel nourished. And certainly accomplished.
If we can overcome ourselves, we can overcome anything.
Thursday, January 6, 2011
You can't clean the floor with a dirty mop!
Happy New Year, 2011!
My family and I just returned from a week-long vacation in Florida. Lots of sun, lots of vacation and lots of indulgence! This of course, was Christmas #2. And really, despite my profession and level of training I usually loosen my clean habits quite a bit after Thanksgiving. This year was quite loose. Maybe it was the huge release after my nuptuals at the end of the September.
Regardless of the intricate rationale, my body has certainly had enough and I am ready to return to my natural, clean roots. I decided to eat an elimination diet for two weeks followed by a longer abstinance of all that haunts me: chocolate, gum and even dried mangoes. The next few weeks will also include, more meditation, yoga, journaling and reflection. Less media, input, and inflammation.
And in no small order, my husband has decided to join me.
I cannot articulate how eager I am to get started. I'm not worried too much except maybe a bit about the no gum part...I am sure that all the artificial sweeteners in the gum that I chew has added up and poisoned by brain (so that's what's wrong!!!). Also, I will miss the coffee first thing in the morning.
But it's not about what I'm taking away. It's what I'll gain: energy, insight and more love and compassion for my physical self. We should all treat ourselves to the highest qualities we can.
Alright, didn't do so well getting to bed early...progress not perfection I suppose. And now a word from the Title sponsor...
This is the husband...and I quote...
"Counter any symptoms of comfort-food withdrawal with creative snacks. Try 'baklava oatmeal'. "
Um, no, I'm not going to try that...I like Baklava and I kinda like oatmeal...but never in my wildest "creative snack" would I put those two together...
By the way I've chewed tobacco for 16.5 years and while its been on and off since 2008, we all know its been more on. So its been a week (cause I'm good like that) and the cravings are just hitting. And now no sugar. Or Beer. Or coffee. At least there's almond milk! (which IS GREAT. If you're not off the dairy, you're missing it)
So enjoy my tobacco-induced comfort-food withdrawal over the next couple of weeks and if anyone has any ideas on "creative snacks", please let me know.
My family and I just returned from a week-long vacation in Florida. Lots of sun, lots of vacation and lots of indulgence! This of course, was Christmas #2. And really, despite my profession and level of training I usually loosen my clean habits quite a bit after Thanksgiving. This year was quite loose. Maybe it was the huge release after my nuptuals at the end of the September.
Regardless of the intricate rationale, my body has certainly had enough and I am ready to return to my natural, clean roots. I decided to eat an elimination diet for two weeks followed by a longer abstinance of all that haunts me: chocolate, gum and even dried mangoes. The next few weeks will also include, more meditation, yoga, journaling and reflection. Less media, input, and inflammation.
And in no small order, my husband has decided to join me.
I cannot articulate how eager I am to get started. I'm not worried too much except maybe a bit about the no gum part...I am sure that all the artificial sweeteners in the gum that I chew has added up and poisoned by brain (so that's what's wrong!!!). Also, I will miss the coffee first thing in the morning.
But it's not about what I'm taking away. It's what I'll gain: energy, insight and more love and compassion for my physical self. We should all treat ourselves to the highest qualities we can.
Alright, didn't do so well getting to bed early...progress not perfection I suppose. And now a word from the Title sponsor...
This is the husband...and I quote...
"Counter any symptoms of comfort-food withdrawal with creative snacks. Try 'baklava oatmeal'. "
Um, no, I'm not going to try that...I like Baklava and I kinda like oatmeal...but never in my wildest "creative snack" would I put those two together...
By the way I've chewed tobacco for 16.5 years and while its been on and off since 2008, we all know its been more on. So its been a week (cause I'm good like that) and the cravings are just hitting. And now no sugar. Or Beer. Or coffee. At least there's almond milk! (which IS GREAT. If you're not off the dairy, you're missing it)
So enjoy my tobacco-induced comfort-food withdrawal over the next couple of weeks and if anyone has any ideas on "creative snacks", please let me know.
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